The most important thing about flying with special needs is that the traveler needs to be as knowledgeable and self-sufficient as possible. Not completely relying on assistance is key, as customer service can be very unreliable in the travel industry (Assume that things will not be arranged ahead of time even if you call ahead. This way it is a nice surprise run smoothly, but is not devastating when the unplanned happens).

• Smile - a lot - breath - and remain calm (even if you don't feel it!). People respond much better to a smile. In fact, a simple smile can lighten stressful situations quickly.
• Confirm with your physician and the airlines that you are allowed to fly. Airlines will not allow you to fly if it is determined that you require extraordinary care and are not traveling with a companion who is able to care for you, or if you will in any way endanger the health or safety of other passengers (communicable/infectious disease).
• If a travel agent or someone else arranges travel for you, it is still important that you or your traveling companion understand the process and can communicate on your behalf during travel.

• Have a back up plan if your checked luggage, scooter, wheel chair, etc. doesn't arrive at your destination. Carry along contact information for equipment rental facilities. Remain calm and speak with supervisors if necessary. The airline will usually supply a replacement until your equipment is found or replaced, but as you know it may not be of the same quality or standard that you prefer.
• If you are discriminated against, ask to speak with the Conflict Resolution Officer. All airlines are required to have a CRO at the airport or available by telephone. If you have unresolved issues or if you feel you were discriminated against, file a formal complaint once your travel is complete. Write the name, date, flight number, location, and complaint down and file immediately when travel is complete. You must file complaints within 30 days. DO NOT EVER LOSE CONTROL, AS THIS WILL ONLY RESULT IN LONGER DELAYS, DENIAL TO BOARD, FINES, OR IMPRISONMENT.
• Communicate at every level exactly what your needs are, and never assume information will be passed along. Just because a competent reservation agent or gate agent collects the right information doesn't guarantee this information will be passed on to the flight crew. It is a good idea to call and speak with an airlines reservations agent and ask them to document your special needs in the flight record. (I also then recommend calling back to confirm that this was done.)